TABA Volume 2 – 4/6/14

What can I say about yesterday, but awe inspiring greatness…  Woke up and had a wonderful interview on 88.7 The Good Show with Tom Urquhart and Chris Bellomy discussing all that was involved in this quest to get “There and Back Again” in the last Hobbit movie.  Thank you, gentlemen; it is always fun to catch up with you guys and the brash laughs of early Saturday morning delirium. 

After we played the song, we spoke about the direction of this quest and as we did, it became clearer and clearer to me the modality of my actions and thoughts.  Often I have been told by a few people in the music industry that this is not how one normally goes about it, but I have never been one to do what is normal.  Maybe that is one of the reasons why I have struggled for so long, but I know something rewarding will come of letting the music speak for itself and inspire the desire for fans to share with others.  In regards to not doing it the “normal” way I do not want to blacklist myself for coming at it differently, so I will continue to move it through traditional means, hoping the song goes viral by being spread by loving friends and fans and reaching out to publishers to pick it up to pitch it directly.  As well, consult with an entertainment lawyer on all the ends and outs.  It is a very complicated business, dizzying to the mind that is wired to create, but I will tackle this with the veracity of Dick Butkus, who was described as “Moby Dick in a goldfish bowl.”  The main difference is that rather than knocking people’s heads off their body, I desire to knock the industry off it’s feet in a way that is authentic, humble, respectful, unique and true to the person I am. 

Later that afternoon and after talking with a friend who just returned from India and feeling her enthusiasm of a life changed through daily miracles, the second wonderful thing happened.  A vision came to me, sitting in meditation in front of the post production house in New Zealand, with a stack of cds of “There and Back Again” visualizing a conversation with them.  Next to me was a sign that read “Many lovingly supportive people flew me 7,568 miles to share with you this song for Hobbit 3. It deserves to be heard. Thank you.”  

I know they are very busy right now working on the movie and I feel I should honor their place and not follow people around like a beggar.  I will cross the ocean and stand in the middle of the bridge.  The half they must traverse would be merely stepping out the door and receiving this song and I sitting upon their lawn.  This may seem crazy or fool-hearted, but along with every other digital thing I am doing, it feels very respectful to honor their work and privacy, simultaneously making myself available.  Many things are happening.  Something is pushing this forward and I will go with it with all me gusto. 
That same afternoon a very talented friend Kristin from the Bhakti House Band texted me that her and her husband Randall were in the recording studio with Allen Astin, the brother of Sean Astin who played Sam in the Lord of the Rings.  “Come over and give him a cd!  We’re recording so just drop it in the mailbox.”  So needless to say, I was in the car immediately.  Twenty minutes later there was a stack of “There and Back Again” cds and my last album Zero Point, in their mailbox with personalized notes to Allen and Sean.  One of things that began this journey was a song called “Song of Banazîr” that is on Zero Point inspired by one of my favorite Tolkien characters, Sam Wise Gamgee or Banazîr in Hobbiton.  I only know that because my sister Kelli, sensing my nerdity bought me a Tolkien encyclopedia a few Christmas’ past.  Sam was by no means the smartest, strongest, most talented or beautiful of the characters in Tolkien’s world, though one thing stood out to me that put him in the highest regard in my mind; Sam’s unwavering devotion to his friend and to what is right.  In the LOTR Sam comments to Frodo that someday they will write a song about Frodo and Frodo replies that he would much rather hear a song about Sam.  I agreed and so I wrote him a song.  The chorus in “Song of Banazîr” is what inspired me to re-write the tune so that it would fit better with a sound and instrumentation befitting Middle Earth; one that would resonate with Bilbo’s journey to the lonely mountain and back again.  To give Sean Astin “There and Back Again” and “Song of Banazîr”, a song inspired by Sam and his impeccable performance of him was a dream come true and a huge movement toward getting the song heard.  I am continuously amazed by all the miracles/doors opening right now, which leads me to the show last night.

First of all I want to thank everyone who came out and lovingly donated to the Cause, especially Brynn for allowing us to host it at Elemental Yoga and Joe and Christin for donating their valuable time and energy to practice and perform with me.  Slowly and surely I am reaching my goal of $10,000 which will go to getting me to New Zealand and putting “There and Back Again” on a double album.  It was a truly powerful night in many ways.  Playing with Joe Vee on harp, bells, clarinet, flute and percussion and Christin Duke on violin and harmonies has been a wonderful remembrance of the way I have always meant to sound.  I feel a renaissance returning to me that was brought on by the sound captured in the recording of “There and Back Again” and our show last night.

This year has begun in such an impactful way, beginning with moving on from the group that I had been playing with for a few years.  As fun as it was and as hard as it has been to go through this change, there was something lacking and that lack was only my own disconnection with my purpose.  For many years now I felt a need to really let loose and a deep seated anger was calling for release so during that time I attracted the people and means to really help facilitate that.  We rocked!!!  It was exhilarating, but as this weight was lifting something was coming to the surface, a genuine desire to return to my acoustic core.  It is what I am at heart, what I have always been but got distracted from in the belief that I needed to be loud for anyone to hear.  I know now that I did not need to be loud at all, I just needed to be myself, people will listen when one is being their authentic self.  For the last few years I had heard “YOU GUYS ROCKED!” but something I heard last night that validated the feeling that I am moving in the right direction is someone saying, “that was a very powerful spiritual experience.  Thank you.”  No, thank you, Monica.  That is all I have ever wanted to do was create an experience with this music that moves the Spirit in others.  I finally feel I am on the right track again.  Now, I am bringing together a group that is spiritually and classically founded.  I hear a tribal symphony supporting this music: stand-up bass, cello violin, winds, harp, bells, acoustic, drums, percussion, harmonies and different organic world instrumentation that feels as if we are in an epic soundscape of cinematic magnitude.  It will wrap around you like nothing you have ever heard, yet familiar as a devout lover.  I could not be more thankful to all that is unfolding in my life and for the people that are in it.  Yesterday felt as if Great Spirit was truly leading the way and after many laps through the labyrinth, I am listening.  I am listening.

My goal is to leave for New Zealand mid May and stay for two weeks, camping and eating pbjs most of the time to not incur any major expenses.  The more I save on this trip, the more I have to put toward the release of this new album that I know you will absolutely love and will make your other cds jealous.  Haha!  Soon I will get an iphone device as well, so I can add some video action to these blogs so you can see the adventure unfold with me.  Thank you again everyone who came out last night, everyone who donated, everyone who has shared the video, everyone who has donated and everyone who has helped in any way.  Shit’s gonna happen!  Already is, as a matter of fact!  =)